April 20th, 2009
I’m going to be 21 in less than two weeks and it’s just a little bit scary.
In so many ways I’m not ready to be an adult, but in so many other ways I really am.
It definitely feels like a time of change for me. I’m taking advantage of this.
I want this massive turning point in my life to represent something positive. I want to be a happier, healthier person.
That will be my present to myself. Achieving this won’t be easy. I am so stuck in my bad habits and ways that it’s going to be difficult to change.
I can do it. 
Watch this space.
Posted in A moment in time, She's Been Thinking Again | No Comments »
April 14th, 2009
On an update from me previous post my cat seems to be healthier than she was. We have tried her on some new food and she seems to be gaining weight and her fur is growing back healthier than ever. To be fair, the change also conincided with our neighbours moving and taking their bully of a cat with them.
In other news.. well not really news.. I’ve been thinking a lot lately. It’s as if all this stuff I’ve supressed from my childhood is coming back with a vengence. Especially my parents divorce. I’ve always maintained I was too young to remember it or be affected by it but I realise that it has actually affected every little detail in my life to this day. How depressing.
I’m not letting this mess me up. If anything it’s helping me to work through all my issues. Especially my anxiety and panic attacks. Don’t get me wrong - I’m no this totally broken person. I just find it hard to function and interact with the world the way everyone else seems to be able to. I’ll get there.
Posted in She's Been Thinking Again | No Comments »
February 23rd, 2009
Mum doesn’t think our cat is too well. She has lost weight, has a big lump in her belly - and on top of this - is constantly getting attacked by tom cats and so she has tufts of fur missing and massive wounds all over her.
She’s laying on my bed with my at the moment. The sky is blue, there’s a nice breeze and she looks so peaceful.
I guess I just wanted to document this moment because I don’t know how many more of these I’ll get.
Posted in A moment in time | 2 Comments »
February 20th, 2009
No more spam! I finally figured out how to install the spam filter (yes I am that dense..) and so now updating isn’t such a daunting task. Before I had to go through and manually get rid of anywhere up to 1000 spam comments. Ick.
So an update: Summer School has finished, and I’m just waiting on the exam mark (hopefully at least a B). I have a week off and then semester one begins! I am really excited about it, but also really ugh about my timetable.
Monday: 10am - 5pm
Tuesday: 9am - 5pm
Wedsnesday: 9am - 6pm
Thursday: 9am - 6pm
Friday: 2pm - 3pm
I have TWO nine hour days?!! That is insane, and painful! The worst part (or best?!) is that I’ll only have 2-3 classes on these days.. which means I have anywhere up to 7 hours to kill. I can’t go home because I live about an hour away from uni (which means I’ll be getting home around 8pm some nights) so I’m going to have to find a comfy hidey hole somewhere.
I’m hoping to be studious during these breaks and get everything done, but more than likely I’ll find a free computer and get on facebook, or find friends to hang with or something like that.
Thank goodness it’s only a semester of this - but that’s still 12 long torturous weeks. 
Anyhow, it’s too ho to be sitting here with my laptop on my lap, so I’m gonna call it a night and read for awhile.
Posted in University | 2 Comments »
January 8th, 2009
First of all, let’s conclude from our previous entry. In short, Rod’s funeral was terrible - I mean.. funerals arn’t supposed to be “great” - heck, someone has to die for one to be held - but there was no celebration of his life. Every acheivement was related to his “church” - every good thing his did for the church was taken credit for by the church.
I don’t think I mentioned the fact he was mormon in the previous entry. Maybe they farewell their dead differently?! No one once mentioned his awesome guitar playing, or wonderful sense of humour. Just the fact that he “only” managed to complete four months of his “mission” - everything was drawn back to religion. At one stage someone had the gall to say that he (Rod) was going to heaven purely because he went to the only right church (as in the LDS/mormon church as a general organisation) and was a true follower of god.
How completely ridiculous is that? GRRRR! I’m not religious in any way, shape or form, but I have no problems with people who pratise their chosen religions provided they don’t hassle me, or use it to justify horrible things (war, anyone?). And especially as long as they don’t use it to judge. There are many forms of Christianity, who’s to say any of them are the right one? To be fair, at the end of the day you all believe in the same God, you just practise your worship differently. I realise it may have just been one narrow minded man, and I’ll try not to let that affect my opinion of Mormons on a whole (Stephenie Meyer is a pretty awesome mormon, just as an aside) but GRRRR at him!
I’d really like to hear you opnions on this (religion and such).
Anyhow, to the main event! Summer school has started.. and it’s terribly borning. The lecturer is great, but the content is mind numbing. It’s basically a revision of primary and intermediate school maths so far. Yawwwwn.
I had way more to say, but I’m actually quite ill. Ugh.. What a cop out of my intention to blog about summer school then going off on a tangent.
Posted in She's Been Thinking Again, University, You Know What Really Grinds My Gears? | 2 Comments »
January 5th, 2009
How do you do it?
How do you say goodbye to someone when it still hasnt sunken in that they really are gone?!
I can say it in my mind: “Rodrigo is dead” - but I can’t process it. I will never see him, talk to him, laugh with him again?
I’m in a state of disbelief. I’m thinking I’ll get a txt from him soon “lol, just kidding!” but I won’t.
I’m terrified about the funeral. Sometimes at funerals I start crying and sobbing really hysterically, and it’s embarrassing. It sounds so vain, yes, but it draws attention and that is the last thing I want. A funeral service is about remembering the persons life, and the good times. I know it’s also for grieving, but I just don’t want to seem like some pretentious git making a big scene.
I wish Rod was here. He’d make some big joke out of it, and we’d have a great laugh.
In other, far less morbid news, summer school starts tomorrow. I’ve been focussing on this a lot. Summer school is a bright, happy prospect.
Sure, so I’ll be studying maths intensively for the next 6 weeks, but it’s something constructive to do with my time. I’ll be out of the house, I’ll be working towards my degree!
I’m going to try working on my website over the next few weeks. I’ll be reopening hosting (nearly anything considered - leave a comment if you’re interested), and working on making my own theme for word press! I’m considering downloading some themes to look at how they work (remember I’m still in the stone age when it comes to this website thing these days).
Anyhow, I best shower and make myself presentable for farewelling a friend.
Posted in R.I.P, She's Been Thinking Again, Site Stuff | No Comments »
January 4th, 2009
It’s been less than a day since I posted with my first entry. Full of optimism about uni and the like.
Here I am, 11 and a half hours later posting with some really sad, devastating news.
Today (or rather yesterday now..) at 12.30pm (The exact time I posted my previous entry.. ) my friend Rodrigo “passed away peacefully”.
I only found out late this evening (around 10pm) when his brother txted to let all his friends know.
It wasn’t completely unexpected - he had a heart condition and went in for surgery in mid december to correct it. He made it through the surgery and was making progress, but something happened clearly and he passed on.
I’m bummed. I really am. He was a brilliant guy - happy, cheerful and excellent at guitar. I know people always praise someone after they die even if they weren’t that great, but Rod was truly a genuine kinda guy. One in a billion. He had a wicked sense of humour (always had me in hysterics with his witty jokes), and was just an all round good person.
I’m not gonna try and spin it and make out like we were bestest of friends. We saw each other rarely, and spoke occasionally on msn.. this wasn’t because we didn’t get along.. he lived in a different part of Auckland, and just never really seemed to get a chance to hang. When we did talk on MSN it was always great - we’d have big long funny elaborate conversations - always memorable.
We had a big conversation the night before he went in for his op. We talked about anything and everything. Some part of me felt like that was our final conversation. I knew I was saying good bye - I wanted to save the conversation we had - something to remember him by? I didn’t - I thought it would be too morbid of me, and bring bad luck.
I miss you Rod. You were an amazing, brillaint, talented, funny, cheerful, friendly, wonderful guy! I will always remember you as the shining star you always were, and always will be. R.I.P
Posted in Bad News, R.I.P | 1 Comment »
January 3rd, 2009
OH BOY! Wordpress!!
I braved the big scary wordpress beast and finally got it installed and set up (thanks of course to fantastico, and a friend of mine!).
I realise the theme is rather default, but I’ll work on that. I’m going to read up all the info I can on wordpress and become a super wordpress know it all, because at the moment I am a total n00b.
Anyhow, let’s get down to business.
I’ve decided to start up this blog again to keep you posted on my adventures as a first year BSc student (Bachelor of Science). I finally completed TFC (Tertiary Foundation Cetertificate - University Entrace qualification) at the end of last year and had my little graduation ceremony.
It felt so great! It was the first thing I really completed since Intermediate School (Year 7 & 8).
I was originally intending to enroll in a BA and major in history, but none of the papers were really that interesting, including all the papers across the other arts subjects. I thought about it for a few days and realised my true passion was geology. I decided to go with a BSc, because it would be more challenging for me, and keep me interested. I’m taking Geology, Geography, Maths, Physics and Computer Science papers this year, and I’m really excited about it!
I start summer school on Tuesday (6th Jan) and am taking Maths 101 (Maths and Physics will be my weakest subjects by far) so that I can concentrate on it purely for six weeks, in hope that it will help me grasp it better.
That’s all for me to say at tis moment in time, I really need to get ready to go out and go stationary shopping (best kind of shopping there is!!).
Tags: BSc, happy new year, i'm back, n00b, TFC
Posted in Computer Science, Geography, Geology, Maths, Physics, She's Been Thinking Again, University | 1 Comment »
January 2nd, 2009
Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!
Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »